My archenemy, anxiety, the unwelcome guest who always stays too long, has been with me ever since I learnt the word "boo." Anxiety is a hyperactive gremlin that likes to make molehills into Mount Panics and has a megaphone for worst-case scenarios. Being anxious all the time seems like I'm standing precariously on the edge of a cliff, afraid that any gust of wind would send me flying off into the chasm.
My life is a sequence of "Panic Button Chronicles," with each installment being an amusing (looking back) misadventure driven by my hyperactive mind and insufficiently active relaxation button. Whether it's
The Supermarket Saga
An ordinary trip to the grocery store for milk escalates into a full-blown existential crisis regarding the organic kale chips' nutritional content. (As it happens, kale is the spinach of anxiety—it always makes you second-guess your decisions.)
The Public Speaking Spiel: A lighthearted introduction that turns into a Shakespearean tragedy complete with sweaty palms, trembling knees, and a voice that vanishes like a magician's rabbit for no apparent reason. (It's likely the crowd believed it to be performance art.)
The Social Butterfly Blues
A cordial discussion that has the vibe of a high-stakes poker game, where each word could be a bluff and each quiet could be a loud indictment. (Why can't casual conversation be about the weather and adorable puppies rather than existential theory?)
Hey, there are humorous aspects to even tension. Like the time I freaked myself out by thinking an email typo was some kind of government plot and went crazy searching Google for "Illuminati recruitment tactics via typos" (turns out, they prefer subtler ways, like reality TV shows). For example, I once spent an hour perfecting a carefree "just woke up" selfie, only to discover that I appeared as though I had been dragged backwards through a hedge. (Anxiety is the best beauty filter; nevertheless, it makes you appear like a frightened deer.)
It's not always sunshine and rainbows when you live with this internal panic button. It's draining, lonely, and occasionally downright frightful. However, I'm learning to embrace rather than reject my gremlin. Here are some tools I use to combat the panic button for relax .
The Mindfulness Shield:
The arrows of worried thoughts are repelled by this reliable shield. It serves as a reminder to me to examine my anxieties objectively, much like when I watch an especially dramatic soap opera. (Because, come on, my anxieties aren't staged.)
The Antidote to Humor: Laughing relieves anxiety better than any medication. I chuckle at the foolishness of my concerns, at how silly I am, and at how easily a stray eyelash can drive me into a complete meltdown. (It turns out that, aside from actual medication, laughter is the finest medicine.)
The lifeline of a support network:
Nobody should go through this alone. I encircle myself with people I love who support and understand me, which serves as a constant reminder that I'm not fighting this anxiety battle alone. (It turns out, even the most courageous heroes require a solid support system and a decent therapist.)
I am not defined by The Panic Button Chronicles, even though they may be my reality. I'm smiling at the ridiculousness of it all, enjoying the messy, beautiful journey that is living with anxiety, and learning to navigate life with my gremlin in tow. I therefore say this to all of my fellow panic button warriors: don't let your fears make you less bright. Remember that you're not the only one with these peculiarities; own it and enjoy the fun. All of us are just a group of absurd, overanalyzing misfits on this crazy ride called life. So let's get comfy, press the panic button (only for kicks, of course), and take pleasure in the journey—one dramatic breakdown at a time.
Note: This piece avoids sensationalizing or downplaying anxiety while striking a balance between humor and self-compassion. It places a focus on developing constructive coping strategies and the value of social support. Its approachable and relevant tone renders it suitable for a broad readership.
